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All rights reserved. Onechanbara: Bikini Samurai Squad Xbox Closed-door testimony by State official describes Giuliani's 'campaign of lies'.
Generally unfavorable reviews - based on 39 Critics What's this? Mixed or average reviews - based on 56 Ratings. See all 39 Critic Reviews.
Hell hath no fury like a girl gamer scorned. In our charming Heather's own words, "If I wanted to watch a bad porn, I'd rent one instead of wasting seventy bucks on a game that is utterly pointless and frustrating. You just picked up Onechanbara — excitement is in the air!
What does it take to make a successful game nowadays? Actually with those ingredients you could make a kick ass Michael Bay film, but it takes quite a bit more than that to make an excellent game. Onechanbara: Bikini Samurai Squad seems to think that half-naked Asian girls, samurai swords, zombies, and buckets upon buckets of blood will get you a stellar title.
The opening cut-scene tells you all you need to know about Onechanbara: Bikini Samurai Squad. The title tells you all you need to know actually, but anyway. A bottom is having a shower.
Onechanbara is one of those bizarre, yet wildly popular franchises that makes absolutely zero sense without the disclaimer "Japanese fan favorite. The visuals pay off almost immediately. Loading up the game triggers a gratuitous cutscene, wherein brooding anti-heroine Aya languishes in a steamy shower as her sometimes rival and little sister Saki watches a news report of the latest invading zombie horde.
It believes that all it need do is show you some plastic-looking tits, some very bloody violence and flashy bright things and it can lull your sub-evolved reptile brain into some kind of alpha-wave state that you mistake for being entertained. In fact, OBSS manages to fail when it comes to delivering each of its key elements. First, they look fake. Not boob-job fake, mind you, but water-balloons-stapled-to-a-mannequin fake.
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When you are playing Onechanbara: Bikini Samurai Squad you might need to forward some ports in your router. Forwarding ports is a useful trick in gaming because it can really help to make your network connection most stable and intermittently even faster. Routers were not designed to allow incoming network requests and some games can play tremendously better if an incoming connection is forwarded through the router to the game. The easiest way to locate your router's IP address is to run our free Router Detector utility.